It may sound bizarre, as bizarre as people say my Lizardophobia is…but my friend Jane (Oh I’m feeling sorry for her already!), has a strange kind of phobia, which I have named as “Invoicingo Phobia”, with the least attempt of mocking her pathetic situation.
Now blame it for her being a female, or possessing a weak spirit of mind, but she always start crying when she is screwed up with the paper bills! She is however a systematized lady, and maintains separate files for her invoices. She clearly demarcates the files names like:-
- Invoices Sent
- Invoices Pending
- List of Invoices Misplaced
- Invoices with Chances of Getting Misplaced- God have Mercy on me!
- Invoices Found- Thanks God!
- Invoices from Regular Clients
- Invoices Blah Blah Blah
- Miscellaneous Invoices
So when I see her crying, or to be precise, ‘sobbing’, the first thing I ask her is- “Which Client?”, “Which file?”
She then replies while crying, “File No. 245 had 106 invoices, 76 are met, 14 are misplaced, and 16 are…boo-hoo-hoo.”
And when I console her with comforting phrases like, “The bills must be in another file”, “It’ll be OK”, “Relax Darling”, she would hoaxingly reply-“IT’S ABOUT MONEY! IT’S ABOUT MY BUSINESS!”
And then, to subside her heavy grief, she would invite me for shopping- “I’m in a soup! I have again messed up with my bills! I need to shop!”
Like this, every week we go shopping, and since she is always the host, she pays for all my bills….my clothes, my accessories, and everything I buy.
Last Sunday something unusual happened. She called me up, crying, and I asked her the usual- “Which Client?”, “Which file?”, “Don’t worry, we will find out solution of your billing woes”, she replied, “It’s not about Invoices! I had a fight with my boyfriend…boo hoo hoo.”
But believe me; her voice was less irritating, less tensed, and less sorrowful, that she generally has while managing her bills!